Dear Ayiti,
You are gorgeous
The way certain wounded things
Always are.
You illuminate
The broken inside of me
The way certain broken things
Always do.
My pieces swing from
The strings of my heart-chimes, swaying
In the lullabies of your wind.
You build me into song.
You are rainbow folded into car crash beautiful.
An accident I find treasure at the end of.
Ayiti, so selfish
Hoarding so many angels
And disguising them as orphans.
You should be ashamed.
Luring me here under the false pretense
That I would be of help
When in fact
I was the one in need of helping.
Your angels
Hiding scalpels in their smiles
Aimed for the most concealed spots on my heart
I have spilled blood, sweat, and tears for you
In the mere 6 days I have been here.
Yet somehow you have Jedi mind tricked me
Into wanting to give more
Ask me
And I would bend my behaviors backwards
Until my pride broke free of the lump in my throat
Until all my silence was transplanted with your laughter
Until all my bones were sun burnt
Here, car horns are a courtesy and everyone is polite
They have left a symphony
Tattooed onto the canals in my ear drums
Which I will be floating down for many nights to come
My ears reading the poems that your heartbeat wrote to mine
I imagine your national anthem
Must be the most beautiful of love songs
Melted down
And painted onto the vocal chords of your people
So that the way they speak
Gives me butterflies in my prayers
Ayiti, forgive me
For treating earthquakes as if they were your national dance
I am
Not worthy of your rhythms
Not worthy of the ways you shake me
But I am so thankful
That your ports are open to me
For you are magic
And I should be ashamed
To see you as anything but.
